Why You Should Embrace Your Pain

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This week I was surprised to find myself with an old familiar friend…anxiety. Just when I think I’ve kicked something in the butt, it comes back at the most unexpected times to teach me a lesson. I have made incredible headway in this area over the last year and so I was shocked to find myself crying in bed yet again.

I guess I should have known this may be coming. I have been doing SO well over the last 2 months and I had begun to question if it was all just a fluke. I’ve never felt this good for this long (I’m talking 10+ years!!) and so I keep expecting the other shoe to drop. Surely I’m not actually, like, better. This has got to end sometime.

I found myself obsessively checking my skin to make sure my psoriasis and cysts weren’t coming back. I would sigh with relief every time I passed the test. I was waiting for my stomach to hurt after every meal and yet the pain never came.

As I was laying in bed one night I realized I had been playing the same old tapes in my head. Over and over again I would hear, “You will never really be well”, “You’re going to get sick soon”, “Enjoy this while it lasts.”

Once I recognized this, I stopped the playback and started asking myself, “Why am I anxious?”, “What am I supposed to learn in this?” and most importantly, “What do I need to do so I can release this fear?” I could have given in to the temptation to feel like a failure or that I was totally backslidden. Instead I chose to embrace my fear, work with it, and figure out what was going on.

Turns out all I needed was some gentle reminders from myself that I am well. First, I gave myself the grace to feel the pain. Then, instead of pushing back against it, I made sure to really breathe into the fear during my meditations the next couple of days and to pump up the gratitude exercises. I reminded myself that it’s OK for me to trust that I am well and to rest in that place.

You see, I think its all about embracing the hard stuff when it comes. There is a reason it’s there and it’s not because the world is against you. It’s almost always because there is something to be learned, a need for growth and to be pushed to the next level. Once we can release the fear (anger, anxiety, sadness, disbelief, etc.) it takes away it’s power over us.

It’s not about getting to a place where you never have problems again. That will never happen. It’s about realizing these roadblocks are there for a purpose and using them to propel you. If you change your story and become curious about what’s going on instead of resisting it, you can change your entire paradigm in a heartbeat. Curiosity is where hardship ends and healing begins.

What do you do when you find yourself falling into old patterns? How are you able to move out of negativity and into hope? Let me know in the comments below.

TODAY’S CHOICE

Today I choose to embrace my fears and release their power over me.

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

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5 thoughts on “Why You Should Embrace Your Pain

  1. Love this post! You’re so amazing and I’m so proud of you!

    For me the biggest thing that has helped me was identifying what the story is that I’m telling myself. Once I know the story, I can change it to reality, or what I need it to be.

    When a car is sliding out of control, you MUST keep your eyes on the direction you want to go, not the object you might hit. If you focus on hitting something you will.

    Thank you for your transparency, it’s good to know we’re not alone I’m the battle of the mind :)

  2. Hi Madeline. I realize I am joining this conversation just a bit late :)but I came to this blog and found some very good posts and information. It looks like it has been a while since a new post was published and I just wanted to say that I suffered from anxiety for a long time! I think us sensitive types are more prone to it. I used a strategy, which I just wrote about on my new blog, to “cure” it.

    I envisioned my anxiety as a big pink monster and started talking to him (not out loud of course rather in my head). Not sure why he is pink (but it is my favorite color). Instead of fighting him and seeing him as something that needs to be treated, or as something I need to change, I simply asked him questions and told him that I’d let him know if I needed him to show up for work in a real situation where anxiety was needed! It wasn’t needed on a daily and nightly basis for months as was the case at that time. In fact, I sent him off on a beach vacation. He came back a few times thinking I needed his services and I told him I appreciated it, but he was free to go back to the beach. In the few years since, I have had only one or two of them. I like it better this way!

    I just wanted to share. I hope you are doing well. Best to you.